and now for something completely different

[makingsouffles]

[She hadn't even really thought about what she was doing when it had happened.

The abandoned starship they'd landed on had turned out to not be so abandoned as they'd thought, instead overrun with desperate humans who were utterly convinced they were hostile, no matter how hard Oswin and Jenny and the Doctor tried to persuade them otherwise. And now they'd been separated and Oswin had to find him, had to make sure he wasn't-

Oh.

He was.

Tearing around the corner, Oswin skids to a halt, her eyes widening as she catches sight of the Doctor pressed against a wall, the man nearby training a gun to his chest. She screams as the gunshot rings out, some instinct taking over, something so deep within her that even Oswin doesn't even know the source. Without a second thought, she throws herself between the bullet at the Doctor, causing it to find another target.

In Oswin's chest instead of his.

She crumples to the ground with a cry of agony, the man retreating once he's figured out he won't be able to get at what he came for.]

Comments

[mrcool]

[He just holds her, swallows back tears and wishes he could do more. It isn't fair for Oswin's life to be ended so prematurely, not fair that he has to face the guilt of losing another friend because of him.

How can he face Jenny and tell her that Oswin's gone? How can he even face his reflection knowing that yet another life has been lost to protect his?

The Doctor turns people into weapons, makes them more dangerous to themselves than to anyone else. He feels the burden of that truth even heavier than normal.

She whispers again, and he knows she's nearly gone now. He kisses her forehead softly.]

Because the sun is going down. [His response is a broken whisper.]

[makingsouffles]

[Oswin rests her head on his shoulder, a hand pressed to his chest over his hearts. She's fading, she can feel it. And she's terrified, so scared to actually die, to lose her second chance.

To lose her family.]

...My Doctor... [She murmurs and if you didn't know, she'd merely sound sleepy, like she always did before when they had laid like this.] Don't let it stay that way.

[mrcool]

[The Doctor kisses the top of her head again, wrapping his arms loosely around her and squeezing gently. Don't go.

He wants to beg her to live, scream at her, shake her until she stops dying and comes back to him, but it would do no good.]

I...I'll try.

[makingsouffles]

You'd better.

[Her voice is just the barest whisper in his ear and with one last shuddering breath, Oswin's head drops onto his shoulder, the rest of her body slowly going limp as the life leaves her.]

[mrcool]

Always have to have the last word, don't you?

[His tone is almost fond, but then he feels her stiffen in his arms, hears her breath stop and it's like his world is ending all over again.

He screams, presses his face into her shoulder and sobs. No. No. Not Oswin too, not his perfect snarky girl who understood him so well, who let herself into his bed just to calm him down from a nightmare, who was so alive and beautiful even in her broken way. The Doctor cradles her in his arms and begs her to come back, he can't lose her, not her too...

When Jenny finds them, he's still holding her tightly, staring blankly at her face and covered in her blood. Gentle touches and a soft voice are all he needs, and he obeys his daughter's suggestions without question, finally straightening up and carrying Oswin back with him to the TARDIS.

He brushes off Jenny's attempts to be reassuring. Laying Oswin's body down gently on a bed in the medical wing, he pulls up a chair and sits down beside her.]

I want to be alone with her. [He tells Jenny, and his voice is so lifeless and flat that it breaks her hearts but she leaves him be.

Jenny cries but she doesn't let him see it. Please, please let the regenerations take.]

[makingsouffles]

[It's a long time, nearly half a day before it happens. Human bodies aren't meant to really do this, she needs time to recover first.

It's subtle, unnoticeable, but Oswin's lips slowly part as time passes by and once they've done so completely, she exhales softly, a wisp of golden light passing between her lips.]

[mrcool]

[The Doctor has not stirred from his place. He doesn't sleep or read or eat, he just sits beside her and thinks.

Time Lords can think a great deal, after all.

His head is hanging and his eyes closed when he hears a soft sound, a breath. He lifts his head slowly and looks around, expecting to see Jenny hovering over him perhaps with a sandwich and tea, but no, he and Oswin are still alone.

Must have been nothing. He sighs and looks down at his lap again.]

[makingsouffles]

[There's quiet again for another hour or so. It's a longer process than if it had been Jenny coming back, because Oswin is very much human and it takes her body longer to adjust.

The bullet wound's closed up, though, if anyone cares to take a closer look and after just a few moments more, Oswin's fingers twitch. She moans faintly, her head lolling to the side. It feels like she's been hit by...something big, and she's so tired.]

[mrcool]

[The Doctor isn't looking at Oswin. It hurts too much. Her blood is still on his hands, his clothes, his face, but he doesn't clean himself up. He won't. It's all he has left of her. Jenny returns and tries to get him to eat something, to lie down, to wash up, but he won't move.

He's let someone else die. How can he just continue to live like nothing has happened?

The Doctor is lost in thought when he hears a new sound. Almost like...breathing. He looks up, glances behind him for Jenny, but there's nothing. Next comes the soft moan. He double checks, but he's still by himself.

The only other person it might be coming from is Oswin, but that's impossible, she's...

He swallows and lifts his gaze to her, just in time to see her head move. His hearts stop.]

...Oswin?

[makingsouffles]

[Oh, there's a voice she knows. Oswin tries to speak, but all that comes out is another soft moan. She feels weighted down by her own exhaustion, unable to really move or speak.

She doesn't know it yet, but she's definitely going to need a few days worth of bedrest.

Memories of what had happened before she...passed out? Fell asleep? Before whatever had happened are fuzzy for now. Slowly, she opens her eyes, letting out a groan.]

Ooh, that was...not nice. [To put it lightly.]

[mrcool]

Oswin. [He gapes, staring at her in open amazement.] But...But how...that's impossible!

[How's that for an image to wake up to? A bloodied, shocked Doctor.]

[makingsouffles]

[Normally, she'd be thrilled at the chance to stump and mystify the Doctor, but at the moment, Oswin's still regaining her fuzzy, disoriented memories.

Once she catches sight of the blood, it's easier to remember.

Her heart aches suddenly, and a million thoughts rush to her mind. How long had she been...gone? What had happened while she was? Did Jenny know? Where was Jenny?

But no, she can't have answers to them now, not when the Doctor needed her to explain. Needed her in general. Slowly, her hand reaches out to take his, despite the fact that it's covered in her blood.] ...Not as much as you'd think, actually.

[mrcool]

I...I don't understand.

[There's a lump rising in his throat of sheer relief, but he's still confused (and quite frankly, worried) about how this has even happened.]

You're--but you're--.

How?

[makingsouffles]

...Me and Jenny, we were...experimenting. With her regenerations.

[Oswin squeezes his hand tightly, just to let him know she's still there.] Didn't really seem fair that you two got to stay together without me.

[And I never want to leave you alone.]

[mrcool]

What?

[He should be angry, and there's a part of him that is. There's a part of him that's furious, but...

But Oswin's alive. He can't be angry at her for that.

He shakes his head and just wraps his arms around her neck, burying his face into her shoulder and breathing her in. She's here. She's warm and alive and she isn't leaving him.]

[makingsouffles]

[Oswin clings back twice as hard, holding onto him for dear life and curling her fingers in the back of his blood-stained jacket. She doesn't even care that it's her blood, they're going to be okay. All three of them.

Finally, she's able to unclasp one hand from the fabric of his jacket, running it softly through his hair.] ...Sorry to scare you.

[mrcool]

[He lets out a sharp gasp of a laugh that sounds closer to a sob than anything and just clings to her harder.]

I thought I lost you.

[His voice is shakier than usual and muffled by her shoulder.]

[makingsouffles]

Takes more than that to get rid of me. [Gently, Oswin presses a kiss to the top of his head, something she doesn't usually get to do, given their height difference.

Her free hand comes to rest on his back, rubbing circles on it.] 'Fraid you're really stuck with me now.

[mrcool]

[He's...relieved that she's back. Pleased that she's safe, so glad that he doesn't have to lose her, but...

He sits up and looks at her seriously.]

You should have told me.

[makingsouffles]

[Uh-oh, lecture time.]

...you would've made us stop.

[mrcool]

Yes, but... [But if they had, then she wouldn't be here. He sighs and drops his head in his hands.]

...I don't know.

[makingsouffles]

[Carefully, she reaches a hand out to rest on his.]

...We'd better get cleaned up. [Nothing like a distraction, right? And they're both covered in blood and generally...not pretty looking at the moment.] I'll meet you in my room, okay?

[Thankfully, her exhaustion has faded away enough for her to get up and walk around for a bit.]

[mrcool]

[He looks up from his hands at her, letting out a soft sigh and nodding.]

Okay.

[He kisses her forehead and stands, offering a hand to help her down.]

...Get Jenny to help you.

[makingsouffles]

[She nods, taking his hand and shakily getting to her feet. She'll definitely need to lie down again after a little while, but she should be able to squeeze in a shower and a change of clothes with Jenny's help.

Oswin squeezes his hand gently, comfortingly.] See you in a bit. [And, releasing it, she heads out to secretly celebrate her success with Jenny.]

[mrcool]

[He manages a little smile for her and squeezes her hand back.]

Yeah.

[The Doctor watches her go before heading off to his own room for a shower and a change of clothes himself. He'll dress in his pajamas once he's rinsed all the blood off, blue with white vertical stripes, and pads off barefoot to her room.]